Secretaries

1/21/2014

While rooting around in the basement looking for something, anything that I could toss out or give away, I came across a book that I have owned for years.  Title: "Standard Handbook for Secretaries"  published in 1973.  I believe that at one time early in my career, I probably had this book on my desk at work.  And, likely I actually used it.  

This book has been sitting in my basement since 1986 collecting dust and has had some water damage to the cover.  It looks like I haven't needed a handbook for a long time but for some reason I'm reluctant to just give it a toss.  Sentimental?  You bet.  There was one other book that I used to drag along with me when I switched jobs and it was a small book containing the spelling of the most common words.  I can't remember the title, but over the years I used it a lot.

Loving the internet like I do, I decided to check out the "Standard Handbook" to see if it's still available.  And it is.  Can't imagine who buys it, but on Amazon the edition published in 1969, you can buy the book new from $79.82 to $735.84!!!!  Ms. Hutchinson published the handbook from 1936 until 2007. I was hoping to find something on the internet regarding date of birth and/or death, but nothing popped up.  All in all, she apparently published 11 editions of the handbook and while I'm sure they are no longer widely used, there must be a few of us "gray hairs" that would find some, but not all, of the information valuable.

A sample of the contents: spelling, pronunciation, postal information, letter writing, telegraph services (now that's old data), extensive information about telephone services (including switchboard) and information about night and weekend telephone rates. Six pages are devoted to dictation (something I really dreaded) and 16 pages about typewritten work.  Once I dusted off my book, I chuckled with some of the things written about that are not, and haven't been for many years, relevant.

For instance, carbon paper (which I haven't used in years and years) copies instructions (and I'm not making this stuff up): 

• clear the desk of all papers but the job on hand. 
• Place the different kinds of paper to be used out on the desk, so there will be no constant pulling out of drawers to get new papers
• count the number of sheets of carbon paper to be used as well as count the number of white sheets to be used each time, before inserting the carbon paper.

All in all there were five steps for carbon copies and one instruction says: tap the top and left edges of each pack of pages until absolutely even.  

While the book is hideously outdated, I can't tell you how much I have enjoyed flipping through the pages of what is now ancient history, to see how both technology as well as office practices have changed over the years.   

And in case you're wondering, first class mail as of the 1973 edition was eight cents per ounce!

Well for all of you folks soaking it up in California, or in other warmer climates, it's snowing quite hard here and this is our first major snowstorm of the year (course we're only 21 days into the year).  Falling snow is so beautiful but snowing brings along other things not quite so lovely - like shoveling!  Luckily for me, as a mother of sons, I never had to shovel, that was something that was done by Jeff and/or the boys.  

Enjoy the weather wherever your are.

P

Flying

1/20/2014

Yesterday, in the late afternoon, Jeff and I took our "baby" (the plane) out for a short flight.  We're still breaking in the new engine, which gives us an excuse (not that we need one), to go flying.  The heater in the plane is way better than the a/c.  In the heat of the summer, it can get pretty warm inside, particularly during a long flight.  But even getting a bit hot is a small price to pay for the immense pleasure we get while we bore holes in the sky!  Now if we had a tit-for-tat kind of marriage, then based on the cost of the new engine - yours truly would literally be dripping in diamonds!  

When you're flying, you can look down and see the cars on the freeway and if it's dark all the houses lit up and brilliant stars. We both like the sound of a small plane but from the ground, I can't decipher one little plane from another.  What I do know is that someone up there is having one heck of a good time while pursuing their hobby or dream - or both.

While I was in the air last night, I jotted down the following on a piece of scrap paper.  Mind you this is not even remotely in the same category as Keats, but for the spur of the moment, I thought it wasn't too bad:

When I fly high in the air

It gives me time to stop and stare

At all the houses in a row 

And people going to and fro

Where do all the people go?

Only each of them know! 

I don't know how it is for other small plane owners, but I know that for Jeff, any day when his schedule is empty (or mostly) and the sun is shining, gives him a good enough reason to go out there and do what he loves doing.  He came to flying a little later in life, but the joy that  he and I get out of being able to fly pretty much anywhere and anytime (weather permitting), can't adequately be described in words.  Just trust me when I tell you that buying the plane was hands down the best decision we ever made!  No regrets.

So when you're out in your yard and you hear a small plane flying overhead, look up and know that there is at least one person inside that plane that is having the time of their life.

P

Coupons

1/19/2014

Today is Sunday, which means that there are glossy pages filled with coupons tucked inside the newspaper.  And for some stupid (and I really do mean stupid) reason, I feel compelled to look at every one of those coupons.  Why do I subject myself to this week after week?  Who knows.  I obviously don't need a coupon for disposable diapers, or hair coloring (only because I refuse to disguise my gray hair - I don't want anybody to question my right to have the senior citizen discount!)  

One thing that annoys me, and believe me, there are others, is the $1.00 off if you buy TWO of something.  I don't want or need to buy two containers of dish liquid soap, body wash, jars of pickles, etc.  Well, you get the idea.  There is only so much room in somebody's house to hold containers, cans and jars of stuff.  And I am simply running out of room!  Jeff and I have always had a very complete and full pantry, refrigerator and freezer and it's not a secret among the family that our house is the place to go if you get hungry!  If, and it's a big if, I ran out of dish soap during a blizzard, the world would not come to an end.  There are always paper plates, etc., I could use in a pinch.  Over the years we simply moved away from using "real" dishes in favor of paper, but with belt tightening in place, I have resumed to washing dishes as opposed to throwing away disposable dishes. 

Yesterday, I dutifully sat down and clipped a few coupons for dog snacks, aluminum foil and a few other products that we ACTUALLY use.  Now here's what's going to happen to those coupons, because this is what always happens.  I will put them in my purse where they will stay at the bottom and get crushed and/or wrinkled and be completely forgotten. I will find them only when I get around to cleaning out my purse (and that doesn't happen very often).  I also never remember the expiration date of coupons, so if I'm in a store and suddenly get a brain flash that I do have a coupon(s), and I can find them, they are almost always out of date.  So what's the point of cutting them out in the first place? 

I have in the past watched that Extreme Couponers (not sure how you spell that) show where women have binders that look like something a bodybuilder would use to build muscles, instead of pumping iron.  They spend hours, and I do mean hours, looking at coupons, clipping, sorting and planning a strategic trip to the store.  Some of these people do dumpster diving for extra coupons (yuck).  Do they save money?  Of course they do, but when you look at their stash of products, it makes me wonder if you really need enough toothpaste to last you for the next four years.  What if you decide you don't like that product any more?  Plus, I am never going to use a coupon for a product that I either don't use or want.  That doesn't make good sense to me.  Be assured you'll never see me on any extreme coupon show!  

But since I did cut out some coupons today, whether I use them or not, isn't the point.  The point is that I'm proud of myself for TRYING to save some money.  Even if I never use them, my intent was good and that's enough for me.

P

 

Tidying Up

1/17/2014

I live in a mostly tidy neighborhood.  What does that mean exactly?  Here lawns are mowed regularly, bushes trimmed, leaves are picked up during the fall season.and sidewalks are shoveled when it snows.  And like in every neighborhood there are exceptions - there always is.  One of my biggest gripes is pushing, raking or sweeping your fallen leaves out onto the street and then just leave them there.  Why do people do that?  Do they think the "picking up fairy" is magically going to appear and take care of this little task for them?  Well guess what folks, the fairy's not coming, so do your neighbors a favor and grab your rake, get a leaf bag and pick up this little eyesore.  Perhaps it's the OCD side of me that finds these old, sodden leaves so annoying.  I'm unsure how these neighbors would react if I just went down the street with my leaf bag and picked up after them. 

I noticed in the paper today how many neighborhoods are annoyed by the Christmas decorations left up long after Christmas is over.  I do admit that I don't much care for the inflatable Santas, etc. that adorn some lawns, but to each his own.  I'm happy to see that for the most part the blow up decorations do seem to disappear quickly once the holidays have passed.  As for the grumbling that I read about in the paper over Christmas lights being left up, I like those lights.  I have always enjoyed Christmas lights and probably always will.  I have a string of small lights on my fireplace mantel and they get turned on every night when I watch television.  Would I leave them up on my house after Christmas?  No because I'm pretty sure that somebody would take offense.  Now if I lived out on acreage, I'd leave the lights up all year long - In my opinion they're pretty.

I did watch several weeks ago a show called something like Lighting Wars where several homes, the homeowners took their Christmas decorating seriously were on television.  These houses had not hundreds but thousands of lights (and sometimes they blinked on and off), animated animals, and anything else you could possibly think of to put in your yard or on the house.  Homes like this were really a disturbance to the neighbors and I can understand why.  But while I believe each to his own, I still think that you should be thoughtful of the people around you. 

When the boys were at home, Scott outlined the roof of our house and the porch posts and bushes with small lights and it was glorious to come home after work and see the house beautifully lit up.  Our rule was that the lights had to come down (weather permitting), or at the very least be turned off shortly after Christmas.  Scott has his own home now and I'm pretty sure that he hasn't abandoned his love of outdoor lights

American Idol

1/16/2014

I don't know if you watched (or suffered) through night one of American Idol's auditions.  Okay, I watched - sort of.  Actually, I thought the commercials were better than the show and that's saying a lot!

At least this year the judge's seemed compassionate when they had to dash someone's dream of becoming the next Idol.  The people that I saw auditioning last night (and I flip-flopped between Idol and another reality show that was cheesy but much more entertaining), were so very young.  I'm not a good judge of good singing, because I can't sing - and when I find a song that does make me feel compelled to sing along - I'm either in the shower or my car, where nobody has to listen to my very off key warbling.  I'm not being modest - it's pretty bad - just take my word for it.

At least we don't have to suffer through a season with Simon Cowell, who, more often than not, I thought was far too blunt with his criticism and I'm pretty sure that the wanna be stars were devastated by his comments (I know I would be).  

I admire the young people who audition in hopes of having a happy ending.  At the end of the day, everyone who auditions week after week know that there is only going to be one American Idol.  It's likely that for most of the contestants their chances are slim, and they know this.  Reminds me of buying a lottery ticket and actually expecting to win a million dollars.  Doesn't seem likely and since I don't buy any lottery tickets, my chances are nil.

I used to wish I could be a stand-up comedian, or act in a local play.  Not since my small role in my senior play in 1967, I have never uttered a word on stage, and know I never will. I don't have the guts to put myself out there and open myself up to negative criticism.   Even writing about "Wilma" is a stretch for me, I know that at the end of the story, if I ever get that far, all I will have to show for my efforts is a ream of paper, filled with black ink.

I will continue to watch American Idol and will likely after a few weeks have picked out a favorite that I will be silently rooting for.  I know they can't all be the winner, but for each week that they stand up on stage and sing their hearts out, they are all winners in my book - at least they are out there chasing their dreams.

P
 

Coffee or Tea?

1/15/2014

Let's go back to 1974 - May to be precise.  I had just begun dating Jeff and as an adult of 25, had never had a cup of coffee.  To be sure I could doctor my Dad's coffee exactly how he liked it - a bit of cream and "99 grains" of sugar!  Dad would never have asked for anything as exacting as a teaspoon of sugar.  No only he and I referred to the "teaspoon" of sugar I put in his cup as just 99 grains.

Oh back to May of '74, and dating Jeff.  He told me one night before visiting friends that had I noticed that when offered a drink after dinner, the offer was for a cup of coffee - not for a cup of tea.  I was thinking to myself - and your point?  Oh and he had one two other thoughts about coffee: (1) first you need to learn to drink coffee; and (2) you need to drink it black.  He assured me that nobody wanted to have to drag out milk or creamer and/or sugar.  So I went into training - coffee drinking.  My first cup of black coffee was disgusting.  All I could think of was why do so many people drink this tar like concoction and they do it willing - and every day!  Ick.  But not one to give up, I soldered on.  Pretty soon I was not having any trouble downing my first cup in the morning, followed by multiple ones throughout the day.  Basically, it came down to this: I could at that point literally drink Jeff under the table when it came to coffee!  Frankly, I believe I still can - though it's in no way a competition - much.

In this morning's paper I was delighted to see a huge article in the Food Section all about coffee, and the myriad of devices out there to help you brew your morning cup.  Some of these new devices look like they might have come from outer space and their prices are really deal breakers - at least for me.

I don't know if you remember but there was a time when every home had a little aluminum coffeepot that you used on your stove.  It looked something like this: 

 

: Then my folks migrated to the Corning Ware coffee pot which looked similar to this one.

After the Corning Ware coffee pot, I know that my parents went through a lot of different coffee pots and eventually coffee was no boiled coffee on the stove. Eventually electricity came to the lowly coffee pot and we Americans have never looked back. There was a time when it seemed like every household owned a Mister Coffee, or something similar..

But now we've gone high tech with our coffee drinking.  After putting up with numerous coffee makers over the years, emptying the grounds, grinding the beans, etc., I finally encouraged (okay maybe I begged) the other half to consider the Keurig machine.  One cup at a time - no grounds, no grinding.  Just cute little cups (though terribly pricey) that made one cup at a time and any flavor you wanted.  I love my Keurig and the taste of freshly brewed coffee each and every time.  Coffee done - drop your little K cup into the trash, no fuss and no muss.  Perfect.

So with a full page article about coffee making devices in the paper today, I had to check out what I might be missing - turns out not much.  There are several little devices, all relatively cheap, that make one cup at a time, but with one device you have to use specific filters (when something needs "specific" anything, then it's been my experience that adds up to $$).  Another one requires that the user needs to learn water pouring techniques (seriously?) and again those specific filters.  Another one doesn't require any special pouring skills (thank goodness) but you can't put it in the dishwasher and it stains.  

The priciest one, starting at $279 and requires no special pouring skills.  It makes good coffee but takes up a lot of counter space (bummer), the decanter is breakable and has more equipment to clean than other devices.  Where do I sign up to buy such a "wonderful" gadget?

Trust me there were other coffee makers mentioned in the article and some of them looked like they were from outer space.  Bottom line: they all make coffee.  Just depends on how much fuss and muss you're willing put up with and whether you believe that the more expensive the equipment is, the better the coffee.  Ultimately, we know that's not true.  And, I have never once been asked by anyone what kind of coffee pot (maker or whatever you want to call it), I use.  Folks just aren't that interested - all they want is a cup of coffee - and there are any number of devices out there that can do just that.

Speaking of coffee, my cup is empty and it's time to get out of the chair and go do something!

P

Wilma Part Two

1/14/2014

Wilma (2nd page).....

So while I’ve been sitting in the chair, my mind has wandered off, which is okay and even expected, when you reach a certain age (it turns out to be a perk, and it maybe the only perk of being old)!  I break free from my revere when I hear, rather than see, the attorney slap an envelope onto the desk.  I stare at my name, which is written in my husband’s handwriting, and know that once I read this letter, there won’t be any others from him. Oh I suppose he could become an angel or something and drop by for a visit, which would certainly scare the crap out of me, and that would certainly shorten my lifespan.  This letter just can’t be good news.  He wasn’t much of a letter writer while he was alive, so why am a getting a letter now?  My mind goes off in a thousand different directions while I continually tap the envelope on the corner of the desk.  

“Wilma, please try and concentrate.  I know you haven’t heard a thing I’ve said so far, which I understand. But, facts are facts – your husband has died and he gave me some very specific instructions.

“What instructions?  Does he believe that he can control what I do even from the grave? I already know he wanted to go out - on the cheap in a cardboard box if I could find one that I could squeeze him into.  He wanted no service, no limo, no flowers, pretty much nothing.”  Trust me I’m going to send him off just the way he wanted.  I certainly don’t want to deny him his final request and it's for sure I'm not going to waste any of my money unnecessarily.  And out of respect, I won’t call 1-800-Got Junk for at least a week."

After the umpteenth time of watching Fred check his watch, I just couldn’t remain quiet a minute longer.  “Fred, am I keeping you from something or more likely someone more important?  You have checked that stupid watch constantly and I don’t want to keep you from anything that you need to be doing.  I know when I’ve worn out my welcome, so if you’ll excuse me I’ll see myself out.”

 

“Wilma, please calm down.  I’m not trying to rush you, it’s just that I don’t know how to best handle your husband’s last request.”

“You mean he had a last request? Seriously?  You mean a request other than to be as frugal (which is simply a nice word for cheap) when it comes to taking care of his remains.  I can and will send him off as cheaply as I can.  Trust me I can do that. I cannot believe that even after death, he's got just one more thing to say to me.  He's gone, and now I'm going to play the game of life my way. I was a good wife and Alan controlled the show, as well as our life much, if not all, of the time. Since I'm clear on what kind of send off he wanted, what else is there to talk about? To really save on money, I intend to cremate him and instead of investing in an urn (and you know they can be pretty pricey), I'm just going to put his ashes in my flower bed along with the petunias. Maybe he'll be good for the soil! 

Watching the irritated look on Fred’s face, I decided to calm down and put on my best nice old lady face, which generally allows me to get my way.  “Sorry Fred I swear I’m listening.  What letter?  And don’t bother to tell me that you don’t have a clue, because I’m not buying that story.  I may be old but clearly I wasn’t born yesterday, so cut the crap and talk to me.” You know and I know that he didn’t just stop by to drop off this letter and have coffee and a chat with you.  Need I remind you that talking to you costs money, and Allen hated wasting money.”........