Company Today!!!

 11/19/2020

Today is a big deal for me. Why? Because, I'm having company - how exciting is that? Stacey, is taking a car in for service. She'll get a loaner car, and then if everything in the universe stays on the path, she'll come and visit me. 

For months, the people who I love understand the necessity of distance. Jeff and I haven't seen family in a very, very long time. Jeff and I are only out of the house, 2 or 3 times a week. Jeff does and always has taken very good care of me. There are not enough words to thank him for putting up with me. It's difficult to have someone, such as myself, around 24/7. And, no surprise, but I can be a real pain in the ass sometimes. 

I have chatted with Stacey and Benjamin on Zoom, a couple of times. It's nice to see and talk to both of them. 

I know this, and you do as well, there is nothing in the world, better than human touch. Scott came over last weekend, and he was good company, for both of us. 

I'm pretty sure the holidays are going to look a whole lot different than the past! And, there's no reason to complain. We're all in the same boat. Jeff and I will cook our Thanksgiving alone. After eating, we can watch a football game (i.e., actually meaning take a nap), or watch a movie. I know that we are not the only two people on the planet, that will, for the safety of others, as well as ourselves, stay home. 

I'm wondering what we'll do for Christmas. One thought that I have is that Jeff and I could deliver the presents to Andrew and Scott's houses. And, if the families would rather we not come inside, leave their presents outside. Doesn't that sound like a good way to celebrate Christmas? Since the virus is out of control, at this moment, people and/or family don't want to really be in contact with you. This is not a personal affront, it's just part of our reality.

The boys are not big on hugs. But, Stacey, Benjamin, Wendy and Elly are huggers. We hug when we arrive, and hug when we leave. And, I miss all of that. The power of human touch is very important.

Here's what I found on the internet. 

How many hugs do we need? Family therapist Virginia Satir once said, “We need four hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.” While that may sound like a lot of hugs, it seems that many hugs are better than not enough.

That's a lot of hugging. But, being hugged by your family or friends, gives you a wonderful feeling. 

When the vaccine is available, Jeff and I want to be first in line. This has been a, to put it delicately, or not, has been a shit show. Forgive the language, but it's the only word that, at least for me, can describe this year.

I've been around a while. I was in junior high when President Kennedy was assassinated. I have watched missiles burst into flame. The Vietnam War, the war in the Middle East, and I could go on and on. But, if you took all of those events and put them together, they wouldn't stand a chance against the battle of 2020.

My family wasn't big on hugs. Even on our wedding day, Mom and Dad almost didn't know what to do, when Jeff hugged them.

My parents loved all of us, they just had a difficult time expressing their feelings. My brother, sister and myself received wonderful presents. They took us to exciting places, while my Dad was stationed in Europe. But, they almost flinched when we tried to hug them. 

I think that Jeff and I, over the years, have tried to physically show the boys how we felt.The boys are adults now, and we can tell them that we love them. When we leave their houses, the boys will give me a one armed kind of hug. 

I had two women in my life, which, I think, made me a good mother (pat on the back). After my Dad passed away, my mother, lived alone. And, though she had opportunities to meet people where she was living, remained to herself. 

I had a different relationship with my mother-in-law, and that's all I'll say about that. These two women influenced my thoughts and dealings with my two daughter-in-laws. I was going to be better. I was going to tell them how I felt. And, I would do this often. And I do and I did.

Since we can't hug our extended families, we can hug whomever we're living with. And, you can, over Zoom, I suppose give yourself a hug. And they'll know that hug is intended for them.

Let's all hang in there, particularly during the holiday season. We will long remember, the virus, the number of people who died, and how our lives were turned upside down.

Before I leave, give yourself a hug, it's free and from me.

P