Depression

7/14/2015

For those of you who know me well, also know that my life, up to this point, has been filled with bouts of depression from time to time.  When my daughter-in-law passed away after giving birth to Benjamin, my depression took hold of me and for years I've been tangled in it's grip.

I happened to see a show on HBO called "My Depression, My Up and Down and Up of It".  This animated show shows people in a way I never could express in words, what depression actually looks like.

I was so taken by the show that Jeff and I watched last night, that I have now purchased the book.  It's a picture book and written by Elizabeth Swados.  

From the ominous black cloud that hangs around the young woman, to the falling into a dark hole, and a ride on the Suicide Bus, gave me a realistic look on what depression looks like.  I have had the dark cloud, the downward spiral and been on the suicide bus twice.  

The beauty of the book is that it explains I believe, to people who are not or never have been depressed an intimate look at what depression looks and acts like.  Depression is like a large train barreling down the tracks, and you never know when it's going to make a stop - for you.   Once it stops, then the battle begins, and it's a tough battle.  You take medications, see a psychiatrist, and try to pull yourself out of the hole.  Unfortunately, this is a battle that for some of us, have to deal with multiple times, leaving us weary.  

My depression is manageable now with the help of an amazing doctor and medication.  Is it gone?  For the moment it is.  Will it be back?  Unfortunately, I believe that it will return at some point and it will be like hitting a wall of bricks.

For now though, I am fine and hope I can stay that way for a long time.

P