My Writings

  

6/15/2012

My Writings

 

I have written for most of my adult years and generally about things I cannot change nor have no control over.  I have stashed those writings and ramblings in journals, notebooks as well as into a computer’s memory.  If all those scraps were put together, they would form a beautiful quilt of my life. 

When I write it’s just me, the real me sitting there with all my faults, dreams, fears, thoughts and hopes.  No external dialogue, ridicule or criticism.  Writing allows me to have a voice, which otherwise doesn’t always get heard in the noise of my family.  It quiets my fears and anxieties which at times can be quite strong and very loud.  

Writing is personal and non-judgmental.  There are no rights or wrongs when I write and there is no need to get approval or feedback unless I want it.  I write to remember and I write to forget. I write to celebrate as well as to grieve.  Through writing I try to gain peace over the things that trouble my soul and haunt my memories.  When life gives me lemons, first I write and then I make lemonade. 

I want to leave my writing for my sons as a legacy of sorts.  I date and write letters to them and leave them sealed in my cedar chest for a future date. A time yet unknown to me or them.  My hope is that when that time comes they will appreciate the words I have left behind.  Unlike the ashes I intend to be, my writing could last an eternity.  I want my sons to know that I, like them, had feelings, desires, goals and dreams.  Life got in the way of some of those dreams and goals as it does for most people. The greatest thing I want my writing to do is to assure my sons that being their mother was my finest calling and greatest joy.  All of this and more I can say through the power of writing – my writing.