6/11/2012
Readers: It occurred to me that I might need to distinguish truth (more or less) from fiction for my writings, particularly for those of you who don't know me - or don't know me well. The story below is real.
In 1973 after 5 years of marriage and one child, I was tossed aside for the other woman. Interestingly, the other woman had the same first name as I do - creepy I know. My son and I age 2 were forced to move in with my parents and younger sister. It is true what they say, you really can't ever go home - well you can - but it's definitely not the same.
By April of 1974 my father (bless him) decided that my son and I should have our own space which I could ill afford. My father and mother said that if I lived frugally they would pick up the slack each month for me. I made a $100 a week and $25 a week went to my son's pre-school. Frugal was the only way I was going to be able to live. I found a one bedroom apartment and moved in with just the essentials - sofa, small dining table, twin size bed for me and a cot for my son. I had a record player and records and very little food in the cupboard.
The week before I was scheduled to move into my new abode, my father came home one evening very pleased with himself. He knew I was lonely and that I feared I would be alone the remainder of my life. Apparently, during a coffee break with one of the ladies from the office they struck up a conversation about a lonely daughter (me) and a lonely brother (Jeff). Between my father and Jeff's sister, Jill, a blind date was arranged. Scratch that, Jill was going to tell Jeff to call me and Dad had told me that I would accept. This is I promise EXACTLY how this went down.
Sure enough a few days later I received the CALL. Jeff asked me out for dinner (which I did not hear) and a movie for Saturday night - May 5, 1974. Dutiful daughter that I was, I accepted. Once the date and time was set my Dad went into overdrive with instructions.
I had at the time a wig (very popular in 1974). The wig was long and light brown and I truly felt gorgeous when I plopped it on my head, which I did often. For those of you who don't know me I have dark brown hair and it's been kept short all of my adult life (because I'm lazy and short hair is so easy). I digress. Anyway, Dad told me that I couldn't wear the wig - what if it came off during the night - horrors - I'd have wig hair!
Dad gave me money to buy me a new outfit - mind you that everything in my closet would be new to a guy I'm just meeting; but, Dad insisted. As the days got closer to the date, my Dad told me not to talk about my son. There would be plenty of time to do that later. Oh and no kissing, it's a first date let's not make it the last date!
It's Saturday night and I've eaten dinner (readers refer to paragraph 5 for the importance of my eating dinner), I'm dressed in my new pantsuit and my hair (real) has been messed with adequately. I have the proverbial 25 cents in my purse just in case I needed to call.
Dad also told me that Jeff was into some kind of radio and to be sure to ask about it. You know be interested in the stuff that he likes. And remember no kissing!
Meanwhile across town, Jeff's sister is giving him an entirely different dialogue. DON'T talk about your Ham radio, turn it OFF and leave it OFF. In honor of our date, Jeff cleaned up his car and wore his best outfit - stripe pants and I believe a checked shirt. I'm not sure of the complete details; but, I do remember it was colorful and the last time he wore that outfit.
At last the doorbell rings. I run to the door, open it quick and step outside and shut the door. I decided that at 24 I didn't need to introduce my date to my family because I was pretty sure this was going to be just a date and nothing else.
My first impression of Jeff was that he was big and had a scruffy beard and I wondered what he'd look like minus all the facial hair that wasn't exactly groomed. I don't know what Jeff thought, but I'm pretty sure he thought I was short (I was and still am).
We get into Jeff's car and there on the dashboard is some kind of radio thing, unlike anything I've ever seen before. I, of course, dutifully remember that I'm supposed to ask about the radio and I do. This launched Jeff off into a flow of conversation about his favorite passion (at that time).
In no time at all, we were at the restaurant and I realized in horror that we were going to eat dinner. Did he ask me out for dinner? I don't remember that at all. The name of the restaurant was "Love's" and they did have good food - but I was not hungry - at all. Still, I did my best. I ordered a salad (which I hate) and pushed it all around my plate eating very little. I was pretty sure that Jeff belonged to the clean plate society and in that area I was a huge disappointment.
The second half of the date was a drive-in movie (remember those). The main movie was Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. The first movie was Charlie Varrick and it stunk. There are no other words to describe it. I was and am a true lover of popcorn and love to have popcorn when I watch a movie. I was also pretty sure that it wouldn't be nice to ask someone to buy you popcorn when you couldn't even finish a plate of lettuce. So I didn't. Here's what I did instead: I would go the ladies' room and during my walk through the concession stand would inhale deeply the lovely smell of buttered popcorn.
At some point in the date, I kissed Jeff. And he promised to call and I told him that I'd look forward t his call. I also didn't believe him. Also, sometime during the evening I mentioned that I wondered what he'd look like without a beard (take note of this people).
The next morning I was subjected to my Dad's grilling - where did you go, what movie did you see and the most important question in my Dad's mind was - did he kiss you? I could answer truthfully when I answered - nope. Dad was relieved until I finished the sentence - I kissed him!
Dad was convinced that by kissing Jeff I had just succeeded in ruining my chances of a second date. He was feeling pretty low about his role as cupid and as the day wore on with no call, I could tell that Dad was thinking "I told you so" but never actually came out and said it. I stayed at my parents' house all day waiting for the phone to ring because my new apartment didn't have a phone hooked up yet. I was getting ready to leave and feeling very dejected (perhaps Dad was right about the kiss - what had I been thinking) and then the phone rang and it was Jeff. Somewhere in the distance bells rang and birds sang. HE CALLED ME.
I agreed to meet him at my new apartment that evening. He arrived at my front door with a freshly shaved face and behind that scruffy beard was this beautiful face, one that I adored then as much as I adore now.
Our relationship moved quickly and we were married on September 21, 1974. This September we will be celebrating our 38th anniversary together thanks to two well-meaning people in our lives. If a certain country song had been around in 1974, I think these words would have been appropriate "you had me at radio."
Loved him then, love him still. Each anniversary we wish only for more years together. This year we'll ask for 38 more years and next year we'll ask for 39. I don't think that's asking for too much.
Love you J
P
No comments:
Post a Comment
Talk to me people. Please leave me your comments!